4b. The S.A.N.E. Approach
The truth is, any guy can work on his Interactional Appeal and transform himself into the kind of guy who is good with women. Hopefully, this is something you understand by now.
Now, if you understand that happy and confident men are more attractive to women than guys who are unhappy and unconfident, what do you do if you're in the second group?
For example, what if you wake up every day and you just feel bad?
Or, what if you are just angry and pissed off at the world all day, every day?
Or, what if you feel nothing at all? Like, what if you just feel "dead" inside and all the days just seem to run together? What then?
Well, assuming you have no physiological causes (see disclaimer below), your lifestyle may be part of the problem for why you don't feel good most days or why you don't laugh or smile on a regular basis.
How do you fix this? Simple. Take action NOW and improve these parts of your life, one item at a time:
Sleep. Activity. Nutrients. Entertainment.
The idea here is that if you consistently get positive versions of these things, a better you emerges. Conversely, if you get negative versions of these things, an inferior form of you emerges.
Now, do you notice how simple all of this is? Do you notice how none of these items deal with having six pack abs, a Ferrari, or the life of your dreams? Do you notice how these are items that all guys, of all ages (everywhere) can work on?
I hope you notice this because working on these S.A.N.E. items is rarely mentioned as helping you to be more attractive and more successful with women.
Why are these items so crucial for confidence and success with women?
Well first, this simple approach to improving your mental and physical health seems kind of basic (even though most people are never taught any of this). So because of this, many guys may overlook these "basics" and blame failures or dating droughts on all the wrong things.
Next, when you're a single guy who is lonely and struggling with women, it's very common to not take care of yourself. Then, by "letting yourself go," inside and out, all of your problems with women can become far worse.
Of course, following The S.A.N.E. Approach to feeling better and looking better fixes all of that.
Now, let's talk about how this works...
Choose Positive Forms
So, if you take The S.A.N.E. Approach to feeling better, you might do something like this:
Spend a few days just trying to get 7-8 hours of sleep every night at the same time. Don't listen to the "gurus" who tell you that you only need 5 hours of sleep a night. They're wrong. Shoot for 7-8 hours. Feel good. Sound good. Look good. It's that simple.
Once you're sleeping well, spend a few days trying to get some kind of physical activity on a daily basis. Your daily activity might be some kind of exercise or it can involve cleaning something, fixing something, or just going for a walk.
Once you're sleeping well and more active, think about your diet and start down the path of eating healthier, drinking plenty of water, and getting the right vitamins and supplements to feel your best.
Finally, find more positive ways to entertain yourself. If your current forms of entertainment leave you feeling angry, depressed, or hopeless, dump them. Don't sacrifice your own happiness for the privilege of getting chewed up (and spit out) by the Outrage Economy. Find positive ways to entertain yourself that make you laugh or think or feel good inside.
Remember, negative forms of these S.A.N.E. items create a negative and ugly form of you.
For example, if you don't sleep enough, you're sedentary, you only eat fast food and junk food, and your days are spent arguing with people online, doom-scrolling political posts on social media and being outraged - while your nights are spent binge-watching porn, what version of you will women see?
In that case, women see the unhappy and unconfident version of you. Or, women see the "weirdo" version of you - the version of you who pretends to be happy and confident (when you're not) and so, something seems "off" about you.
Then, when you project your own feelings of weirdness onto others (i.e., "shining" your Weirdness Lamp), you might start seeing other people acting weirdly around you - which, in turn, makes you feel like even more of a weirdo, right? Yes!
Now, in all of these cases - where you're not showing up with your best self - your chances with a lot of women are close to zero.
On the other hand, if you're sleeping well, staying physically active, eating healthy, and entertaining yourself with content that makes you smarter, funnier, or more interesting, what do women see then?
That's right, women see a happy and confident version of you who is easy and fun to talk to. They see your cool and attractive side and your chances for getting a phone number, getting a date, or hooking up are at their highest.
Follow The S.A.N.E. Approach in your own life, show up with your most attractive you, and win with women.